So Others May Eat

So Others May Eat: Letter 3

Oyez, Oyez, Oyez…Save The Daughters!

A town crier dates back to the 18th century, and is one who makes public pronouncements in the streets on behalf of the courts. Tradition esteems the town crier as one who rings a handbell and shouts the words “Oyez, Oyez, Oyez” before making the announcements. Oyez means “hear ye” which is a call for silence and attention. According to Wikipedia.org, the town crier tradition inspired the early beginnings of the newspaper. Thus, the term “posting a notice” derives from the town crier tradition. Temika Moore: Shining A Light With Pen And Mic is a reimagined 21st century town crier posting notices on behalf of the court of truth as commissioned by I AM, The King, The Creator, The Source, The Redeemer, and The Father to every woman asking, seeking, and knocking to know The Truth.

In a dream one night I heard the words “Temika, you are broken. You need help.” These were the words I heard after getting engaged for a second time. At the time I did not have a full interpretation of this dream. It would take almost four years for me to understand fully why I had that dream and what it meant. I will reveal to you what The Source of All Truth revealed to me about that engagement, along with insights on my marriage(s) in an upcoming post. However, on January 6, 2019, the Holy Spirit directed me to write this post. The Creator, Source of All Truth is serious about rescuing and redeeming women from the original curse brought about by naivety and the subtlety of deception.  I heard in my spirit these words, “the adversary’s reign is done.” I also heard the words “It is finished.” The Source of All Truth was leading me to remove the powers of shame, guilt, condemnation, and darkness by “displaying my sin on a cross” for all to see in the same manner Yeshua was hung on a cross; bloody, beaten and battered for all to see. Sin is not pretty. Sin is costly. Sin is a bloody business. Sin is death. Death can be short or it can be protracted. But the fact still remains, sin has a judgment day. The Creator’s words are true. His written word, as outlined in the book we know as the Bible, is a tool for restoring the earth to the original state The Creator intended. 

“Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another—showing us [the] truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes, training us to live God’s way. Through the Word we are put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us.”

2 Timothy 3:16-17 The Message Version


In my deliverance, I have been purposed with helping to deliver others. I am likened to the abolitionist Harriet Tubman leading those who desire to escape the bondage of living in the lower states to living in the freedom of the higher states. The business of rescue often involves risking one’s life to save others. Over the next several posts you will have an opportunity to glean my process of repentance, deliverance, and redemption. These posts are entitled, So Others Might Eat. The Hebrew word for “eat” is ʼâkal. It means to consume, take in, digest, devour, and slay. I share The Creator’s instructions, words, revelations, insights, unveiling, and discoveries for the benefit of providing sustenance to anyone who is hungry. A feast has been prepared. The table is set. Through these posts, you are invited to dine with the presence of a Holy Creator. This is Holy Communion. Bread will be broken (i.e. God’s word’s divided, separated, and processed), and wine shared (i.e. the fruit of character produced by being pressed into digestible liquid form), all done in remembrance of the Savior and Deliverer, Yeshua/Jesus/Immanuel/Son of Man/The Anointed, and Sacrificial Teacher.

Hello:

I am reaching out to you because The Most High God said that all of his commandments are on display in following these two instructions:

1. Love God with all your will, intellect and emotions; AND

2. Love your neighbor as yourself. 

Matthew 22:37-40 New Living Translation

He said if we do these two things, we have actually fulfilled all of his commandments. He also said to “owe nothing to anyone—except for your obligation to love one another.” Romans 13:8 (New Living Translation) Well, my brother, my neighbor, I have a debt I must pay to you. I am heavy with the weight of carrying this message, so I will cut to the chase. 

I’ll be brief. No harm intended. I’m just following an instruction. I asked God a question over 7 years  ago about some things. He’s been answering my question(s). In a round about way he’s shown me things about life, choices and what is acceptable before Him. He’s taken me on an extremely windy path to get to the root of my path(ology). I know this was decades upon decades ago. But I was young, dumb and naive. Naive and inexperienced with understanding the psyche of young men. At any rate, the moral of the story is a brief kiss or other touching behavior between us between us a kids or teenagers was not appropriate and God wants me to wash away what was not His best. I feel the tremendous weight of having carried the shame of it and my neighbor, I owe you my deepest, sincerest apology. The Lord took me on a long road to help me answer some questions. I also didn’t realize the magnitude of the concept of daddy issues and He took me right to the root and has been digging up everything.  This is how and I why I was lead to you. These self-inflicted wounds were buried and now they are no longer buried. I humbly ask for your forgiveness. If you are not at that place. I understand. It’s been a process for me to ask for forgiveness, forgiving others and hella hard for me to forgive myself. I couldn’t figure out why I was doing or going places that were against what I really desired - love. I apologize for participating in inappropriate intimate behavior as a young girl with you. I know all of this is black history, and that many decades have passed. But I remember feeling a level of shame about my interactions with young men as a young woman. I wasn’t promiscuous as I was told the word is defined. However, The Lord has shown me promiscuity doesn’t always look like a person being sexually active with many people. Promiscuity can be having too many inappropriate interactions with people or simply having too many people touch you. I just remember being in or experiencing inappropriate interactions with young men in my ignorant search for validation, love and value. I somehow was looking for love, ignorantly not knowing what that really looked like. I was naive in many respects as a young woman. I wasn’t very experienced in dating and didn’t really understand the male psyche as a teenager. Nonetheless, I believe I may have carried a certain amount of sadness about being touched by people other than my God ordained mate. Even something seemingly as small as a kiss or touch. But here I am, doing my best to clear the way from my own trauma and history. Whatever environment was established even as a young person can set a tone for our lives unbeknownst to us. But God doesn’t care how long it’s been since a character infraction. He wants all forms of darkness held up to the light. He asked me to do some really humbling things in His process of teaching me His standard. Very very humbling. He asked me to make my story public and post it. That was hard but I did and I’m finalizing the last instructions he gave me. I hope this finds you well. I just wanted to say that.  I am humbled and his standards are clear. He is pouring a new foundation. Holiness involves being honest and transparent and following His ways and I am doing this the best way I know how. He says any form of sexual behavior, even the “small things” society has desensitized us to that are outside of his parameters is unacceptable and he doesn’t care what age it occurred. He wants it confessed and held to his light to be washed clean. He’s shown me a lot of things. Again, I’m sorry for not holding up His standard and participating in that form of darkness. I apologize for how my ignorance of God’s true standards impacted you. When you know His standards, you don’t participate in situations like this. You know better, you do better. I’m sincerely sorry. I have an extreme hate for the places of my past. That’s what The Truth (God) wants for us all leading us to true repentance. Please forgive me. If I had done better, I would have been protecting us both from a form of darkness by not participating.  This is truth. Be well. 

I keep hearing in my spirit, “God is not playing.” He is not playing with us as people. He wants all darkness uprooted, dealt with and crucified. From experience, this is extremely hard. My soul is so tired from doing the work to heal that I can’t tell you how I just want to go and be silent away from all kinds of noise because the heaviness of the places of our past attaches to us and wreaks all kinds of havoc. He also showed me all us have some kind of darkness be it large or small that we’ve buried. This can block even hearing or knowing that He speaks. He speaks!!!!! My God does He speak. I had to share that with you. It’s humbling to go back through your life and be forced to look at things, especially things that were buried deep. But when we ask Him a question, He promises to answer and give an abundance of wisdom. That He has done. He keeps His promises. So, I’m doing my best to honor what He tells me about me, life and others and to share it with a person if they are in a place to receive what He gives me. I hope this message has landed in a soft heart, open spirit, or on the path to freedom and truth.

And so it shall be. 

“Be careful to obey all the commands I am giving you today. Then you will live and multiply, and you will enter and occupy the land the Lord swore to give your ancestors. Remember how the Lord your God led you through the wilderness for these forty years, humbling you and testing you to prove your character, and to find out whether or not you would obey his commands. Yes, he humbled you by letting you go hungry and then feeding you with manna, a food previously unknown to you and your ancestors. He did it to teach you that people do not live by bread alone; rather, we live by every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord.

Deuteronomy 8:1-3 New Living Translation


#kingdomvskingdom #everyword #soothersmayeat #daughtersofnaomi

So Others May Eat: Letter 2

Oyez, Oyez, Oyez…Save The Daughters!

A town crier dates back to the 18th century, and is one who makes public pronouncements in the streets on behalf of the courts. Tradition esteems the town crier as one who rings a handbell and shouts the words “Oyez, Oyez, Oyez” before making the announcements. Oyez means “hear ye” which is a call for silence and attention. According to Wikipedia.org, the town crier tradition inspired the early beginnings of the newspaper. Thus, the term “posting a notice” derives from the town crier tradition. Temika Moore: Shining A Light With Pen And Mic is a reimagined 21st century town crier posting notices on behalf of the court of truth as commissioned by I AM, The King, The Creator, The Source, The Redeemer, and The Father to every woman asking, seeking, and knocking to know The Truth.

In a dream one night I heard the words “Temika, you are broken. You need help.” These were the words I heard after getting engaged for a second time. At the time I did not have a full interpretation of this dream. It would take almost four years for me to understand fully why I had that dream and what it meant. I will reveal to you what The Source of All Truth revealed to me about that engagement, along with insights on my marriage(s) in an upcoming post. However, on January 6, 2019, the Holy Spirit directed me to write this post. The Creator, Source of All Truth is serious about rescuing and redeeming women from the original curse brought about by naivety and the subtlety of deception.  I heard in my spirit these words, “the adversary’s reign is done.” I also heard the words “It is finished.” The Source of All Truth was leading me to remove the powers of shame, guilt, condemnation, and darkness by “displaying my sin on a cross” for all to see in the same manner Yeshua was hung on a cross; bloody, beaten and battered for all to see. Sin is not pretty. Sin is costly. Sin is a bloody business. Sin is death. Death can be short or it can be protracted. But the fact still remains, sin has a judgment day. The Creator’s words are true. His written word, as outlined in the book we know as the Bible, is a tool for restoring the earth to the original state The Creator intended. 

“Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another—showing us [the] truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes, training us to live God’s way. Through the Word we are put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us.”

2 Timothy 3:16-17 The Message Version


In my deliverance, I have been purposed with helping to deliver others. I am likened to the abolitionist Harriet Tubman leading those who desire to escape the bondage of living in the lower states to living in the freedom of the higher states. The business of rescue often involves risking one’s life to save others. Over the next several posts you will have an opportunity to glean my process of repentance, deliverance, and redemption. These posts are entitled, So Others Might Eat. The Hebrew word for “eat” is ʼâkal. It means to consume, take in, digest, devour, and slay. I share The Creator’s instructions, words, revelations, insights, unveiling, and discoveries for the benefit of providing sustenance to anyone who is hungry. A feast has been prepared. The table is set. Through these posts, you are invited to dine with the presence of a Holy Creator. This is Holy Communion. Bread will be broken (i.e. God’s word’s divided, separated, and processed), and wine shared (i.e. the fruit of character produced by being pressed into digestible liquid form), all done in remembrance of the Savior and Deliverer, Yeshua/Jesus/Immanuel/Son of Man/The Anointed, and Sacrificial Teacher.

Fam:

I am reaching out to you because I love you. I love you as my family member, brother, and or sister in the family of believers. I love you because The Most High God said that all of his commandments are on display for ALL people to see in following these two instructions:

1. Love God with all your will, intellect and emotions; AND

2. Love your neighbor as yourself. 

Matthew 22:37-40 New Living Translation


He said if we do these two things, we have actually fulfilled all of his commandments. He also said to “owe nothing to anyone - except for your obligation to love one another.” Romans 13:8 (New Living Translation) Well, I have a debt I must pay to you. I am heavy with the weight of carrying this message, so I will cut to the chase.

I heard the word “inappropriate.” 

I saw two dogs; one dark and one light. They were both females. The dark one started making humping motions toward the light one. Shortly thereafter, the light one started to do the same. Both dark and light had been infested.

I heard The Most High God show me an illustration through what he created; the night sky and the stars. As I stepped out of a light blue vehicle feeling heavy from sharing information that I was instructed to publicly share via the inter-network or internal network aka the internet, I was standing outside the light blue vehicle in front of a dwelling place. He told me “this is the fulfilment of the cross - sin being manifested (the infestation of man) hanging, on display for everyone to see. I weeped. 

He also said now you will know my true name - The Truth. I am going to replace every instance of the word God moving forward in this message with the word - The Truth.

As I weeped in that moment with the weight of the image of all our sins, especially my sins on display for all to see, he immediately encouraged me and led me to look up into the dark, deep blue night sky. I saw stars sparkling like never before. He said to me my stars are lights that light up the darkness. As I looked up at the sky and saw the enduring night sky, He said darkness is vast, it is deep. It is far reaching. My stars glisten amongst the expanse of the darkness. What resonated in my soul bringing me to joy is the confirmation He gave me that he was pouring a new foundation, a new creation, and that I am a part of the light he has placed in the deep, dark night sky.

After He confirmed his message, he revealed to me and assigned me to write this message for my family, my friends, my neighbors, and for you. Disclaimer: The Truth is holy. Holy means sacred place or thing; dedicated. The Truth is sacred. The truth is a place (i.e. a state of being or destination). The truth is dedicated (i.e. resolute, determined, unwavering, enthusiastic, keen, earnest, passionate, fervent).  One thing The Truth is not, is indifferent. The Truth is hardcore. The Truth takes a clear stance and holds its ground. With that being said, the foundation has been poured for me to move to the next word. 

The Truth is sending  or has sent a mighty wind. Wind is a resemblance of breath. Breath comes from someone that is living. Wind can be sensible or it can be violent. But it is an expression and function. The intent of this message will only be known to the person who receives this wind.

Back to the word I heard - “inappropriate.” I was sent on a windy road which led me to uncover the origin of the word molest. Molest is a 14th Century word that means to trouble, grief or vexation (annoyance, irritation, exasperation, anger, crossness, disgruntled, bad mood, aggravation). It derives from an Old French word molester and from a Latin word molestare meaning to disturb, trouble, annoy,’ from the word molestus meaning troublesome, perhaps related to moles or the word mass which is a burden or barrier. Molest as we know it today, relating to sexual assault did not come into use until the 1950.’s

This leads me to the point. All of the above-referenced manifestations (infestation of man) are bad fruits; or bad spirits. Fruit is what you enjoy, what you produce, what you develop, and what you use; its hanging off of you for all to see. Matthew 7:16 (7 meaning complete: 16 meaning love) says that you can identify them (i.e. people) by their fruit, that is by the way they act. Trouble, grief or vexation (annoyance, irritation, exasperation, anger, crossness, disgruntled, bad mood, aggravation) are manifestations (infestation of man) of a spirit that has not received The Truth. “They come out at night, snarling like vicious dogs as they prowl the streets.” (Psalms 59:6). The enemy or spirit that is against The Truth comes out during dark times and like a vicious dog, it prowls. When a being is “prowling” it is  searching in stealth mode (i.e. in secret).

Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil (an adversary against The Truth). He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour (i.e. consume, destroy, engulf, swallow up, take in greedily with the senses or intellect). Devour comes from the Latin word devorare which means to swallow down. Dark spirits swallow you down. Dark spirits are on the prowl to consume or swallow down The Truth.

This spirit that is against The Truth can enter a dwelling place (i.e. where you live; your place of being or living). Dwelling comes from the Old English word dwellen which means to mislead or deceive. Originally it meant to make a fool of or lead astray. There are other languages from which this words derives that define dwelling as delay, sleep, to stun, perplex, out in trance, or stupor, madness, error, heresy, linger, dwell upon which ultimately lead to defining the word to mean “to make a home.” These bad fruits or spirits enter a person’s home, place of being or place of living by the vehicle of secrets. The Truth is an open, shining light on a path illuminating the way to stay straight, pure and certain - holy.

I am deeply humbled to share this. But this is the second of 3 instructions or mighty winds the The Truth has asked me to deliver to people who would inherit freedom from captivity; or who are being hindered. Although these occurrences happened somewhere between birth and 8 years old, The Truth sent a messenger to open the blinds so I could see my way clearly. This is why The Truth keeps reiterating that we are all connected. Your character infraction or mine (sin) affects us all. No one is isolated from the penalty of sin. Each character infraction, no matter what kind has the same penalty. If you lie, steal people, things or or trust, cheat, curse your parents, sleep with animals or many people, have orgies, fondle children, abandon your children, deny your children, sacrifice your children, murder anyone, watch porn, strip, have affairs, eat too much, drink too much, love money, hate people, had abortions, had sexual or inappropriate relations with people of the same and/or opposite gender, rearranging your originally created gender, dabbled with witches and cults, cast spells on someone, communed with evil spirits of any kind, mediums, psychics, magicians and anything that is associated with darkness, The Truth says the penalty for ALL character infractions (sin) is death. It can be spiritual and or physical. Everyone’s brand or choice of darkness may look a little different. But The Truth maintains that darkness is darkness. In The Truth there is only light. There is NO, absolutely and resolutely NO darkness in the holy presence of the Truth. The Truth is firm. The Truth maintains today in the year 2019, tomorrow and in the future. The Truth does not and will never change. So, if The Truth will not change; then we must.

When I was a little girl a spirit came into my home. That spirit was unclean. It was carrying some kind of darkness. That darkness manifested (infestation of man) itself in the form of inappropriate touching. I was inappropriately touched by someone my parent was seeing. I was inappropriately touched by a neighbor and two cousins. I did not say sexually assaulted. Inappropriate is inappropriate; just as two female dogs humping one another. I never said anything until yesterday at the leading of spirit of The Truth. Since we were children, I figured maybe these were just normal childhood occurrences of exploration. So I never thought too much about it. Maybe I was desensitized. In my childhood mind I thought it was normal. That would then manifest (infestation of man) itself in my interactions with people later in life that would cause me to adjust to accept some things as “normal.” I explained what happened to my family and then went on to explain the things manifested (infestation of man) itself in me inappropriately touching my family members: brother, cousins, neighbors kids, and eventually inappropriate touching of someone else’s spouse, not once but twice. I did not say I sexually assaulted anyone. Inappropriate can be vast. It can be humping each other like two female dogs mimicking the actions of a sexual encounter, it can mean hearing or seeing something lude, it can mean fondling, kissing, simply just doing or saying things that are simply not appropriate because you are a child and you are experiencing them with a family member. Inappropriate behavior of any kind is unacceptable to The Truth, and The Truth does not care how long it’s been since the character infraction-sin. He wants it lifted up to be visible to the light so you can see it clearly. So everyone can see it clearly. This is transparency. This is light. This is the essence of the character of The Truth. Once that occurs there is no longer a doorway for a spirit that is dark or a spirit that is against The Truth to “dwell” in you. The secret is out. The dark spirit has no power to destroy you, your life or your family. This is what it means to be pure in heart (mind) and to have a clear conscience before The Truth. You can’t shame a person who has already lifted up the sin to be visible by a transparent light. The Truth says there is no condemnation, shame, guilt or heavy spirit about your character infraction - once you lift it up to the light of transparency and out of the torment of secrecy. Most importantly, it is out the enemy’s reach to use it against you.

I feel the deep heaviness of my childhood character infraction - sin. Yes, I was a little kid, but I still feel the weight of darkness. This is what The Truth wants to deliver us from. I have labored in following The Truth’s instruction to me and my pilgrimage. I wish I could articulate how tired my soul is from doing this work. It’s so tired I don’t have the capacity to care about whether or not I will look bad or raise eyebrows. I am submitted to The Truth. The Truth costs. It is not cheap. It will never be cheap. But I am running a race to honor the true intentions of a high and elevated way of living and thinking. It is not popular and it is not easy. But I live in love, and this is a requirement or mandate of love - The Truth.

I ask for your forgiveness. I ask for your mercy in violating trust. I pray my character infraction - sin has not caused you or your child to dwell in torment because of my ignorance. When we sin, we are acting either in willful intention or ignorance. I don’t want to be ignorant so I search and thirst for The Truth in ALL things. I pray this does no cause upset to your home. The Truth knows me, and he knows you and your child. He is faithful. He is just. He is our high and lifted up Father/Creator that is living, thinking and doing things on another level. This is what we all are striving for - heaven. Heaven is an elevated way of thinking, living and doing on another level. May you find your way to the Father/Creator/The Truth to live on earth as it is in Heaven.


And so it shall be.


Be careful to obey all the commands I am giving you today. Then you will live and multiply, and you will enter and occupy the land the Lord swore to give your ancestors. Remember how the Lord your God led you through the wilderness for these forty years, humbling you and testing you to prove your character, and to find out whether or not you would obey his commands. Yes, he humbled you by letting you go hungry and then feeding you with manna, a food previously unknown to you and your ancestors. He did it to teach you that people do not live by bread alone; rather, we live by every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord.” Deuteronomy 8:1-3 New Living Translation


#kingdomvskingdom #everyword #soothersmayeat #daughtersofnaomi





So Others May Eat: Letter 1

Oyez, Oyez, Oyez…Save The Daughters!

A town crier dates back to the 18th century, and is one who makes public pronouncements in the streets on behalf of the courts. Tradition esteems the town crier as one who rings a handbell and shouts the words “Oyez, Oyez, Oyez” before making the announcements. Oyez means “hear ye” which is a call for silence and attention. According to Wikipedia.org, the town crier tradition inspired the early beginnings of the newspaper. Thus, the term “posting a notice” derives from the town crier tradition. Temika Moore: Shining A Light With Pen And Mic is a reimagined 21st century town crier posting notices on behalf of the court of truth as commissioned by I AM, The King, The Creator, The Source, The Redeemer, and The Father to every woman asking, seeking, and knocking to know The Truth.

In a dream one night I heard the words “Temika, you are broken. You need help.” These were the words I heard after getting engaged for a second time. At the time I did not have a full interpretation of this dream. It would take almost four years for me to understand fully why I had that dream and what it meant. I will reveal to you what The Source of All Truth revealed to me about that engagement, along with insights on my marriage(s) in an upcoming post. However, on January 6, 2019, the Holy Spirit directed me to write this post. The Creator, Source of All Truth is serious about rescuing and redeeming women from the original curse brought about by naivety and the subtlety of deception.  I heard in my spirit these words, “the adversary’s reign is done.” I also heard the words “It is finished.” The Source of All Truth was leading me to remove the powers of shame, guilt, condemnation, and darkness by “displaying my sin on a cross” for all to see in the same manner Yeshua was hung on a cross; bloody, beaten and battered for all to see. Sin is not pretty. Sin is costly. Sin is a bloody business. Sin is death. Death can be short or it can be protracted. But the fact still remains, sin has a judgment day. The Creator’s words are true. His written word, as outlined in the book we know as the Bible, is a tool for restoring the earth to the original state The Creator intended. 

“Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another—showing us [the] truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes, training us to live God’s way. Through the Word we are put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us.”

2 Timothy 3:16-17 The Message Version


In my deliverance, I have been purposed with helping to deliver others. I am likened to the abolitionist Harriet Tubman leading those who desire to escape the bondage of living in the lower states to living in the freedom of the higher states. The business of rescue often involves risking one’s life to save others. Over the next several posts you will have an opportunity to glean my process of repentance, deliverance, and redemption. These posts are entitled, So Others Might Eat. The Hebrew word for “eat” is ʼâkal. It means to consume, take in, digest, devour, and slay. I share The Creator’s instructions, words, revelations, insights, unveiling, and discoveries for the benefit of providing sustenance to anyone who is hungry. A feast has been prepared. The table is set. Through these posts, you are invited to dine with the presence of a Holy Creator. This is Holy Communion. Bread will be broken (i.e. God’s word’s divided, separated, and processed), and wine shared (i.e. the fruit of character produced by being pressed into digestible liquid form), all done in remembrance of the Savior and Deliverer, Yeshua/Jesus/Immanuel/Son of Man/The Anointed, and Sacrificial Teacher.


Hello:

I am reaching out to you because I love you. I love you as my sister. I love you because The Most High God said that all of his commandments are on display in following these two instructions:

1. Love God with all your will, intellect and emotions; AND

2. Love your neighbor as yourself. 

Matthew 22:37-40 New Living Translation

He said if we do these two things, we have actually fulfilled all of his commandments. He also said to “owe nothing to anyone—except for your obligation to love one another.” Romans 13:8 (New Living Translation) Well, I have a debt I must pay to you. I am heavy with the weight of carrying this message, so I will cut to the chase. 

Many years ago, in my ignorance and my own trauma and unresolved pain I had an affair with your spouse. It was the darkest period of my life. As a former spouse myself, I know you know the darkness and pain of an empty or failing marriage. That emptiness and darkness can lead one to places they never thought they would find themselves; even those who “seem” like they are believers in the true and living God. Well, I believed I was. But I wasn’t. When you love God with all your will, intellect and emotions, you don’t have an affair; you go to The Most High God when you can’t get your spouse to “see you” or talk to you. I failed. I remember going to my spouse to tell him I was feeling vulnerable the moment I realized I was in dangerous and inappropriate territory with your spouse. I was hoping my spouse could help save our marriage. I was hoping he could save me from the loneliness I was feeling in our marriage. Crickets is what I got. I remember the only thing he asked me was “Did you sleep with him?” I said do you want to go down this path? I will tell you whatever you want to know; I will not lie to you. I asked, however, are you ready to do the same with me? Once again it was crickets. I was told “whatever you’ve done is between you and God and whatever I’ve done is between me and God.” That was the beginning of the end of our marriage and it took less than a year from that point to unravel. It unraveled because it was never built on the right foundation in the first place. A crack in the foundation will eventually give way; even it takes 20 years for it to be demolished. I say all this to say, The Most High God is amazing. He knew us in our mother’s womb. So he knew the trials we’d bear. It has been an arduous process to come full circle to heal the original traumas that led to the darkness that opened a door for me to have an affair with your spouse. I am deeply saddened at the depth of my sin and how I hurt you, my neighbor, my sister. 

My sister, with everything in me and with tremendous humility given by the spirit of the true and living God, I ask for your forgiveness and your family’s forgiveness. I know it has been many years and I have no desire to cause upset in your home. I want to share with you what The Most High God told me through the experience of failing. The Lord is serious about establishing his kingdom on earth. He is very serious about calling people to a higher standard. He says you will reap what you sow. He is real and that statement is true. He does not care how long it has been since you committed an infraction of character - sin. He will call everyone that seeks after him to the mat. He calls our consciences to be pure and clear before him so we can hear him speak. My God does he speak!!!!!!!! And his words are clear and it is sharper than a two edged sword; cutting through the very heart of the way in which a person is built. I’m analytical and I ask God to show me how  I had gotten to the state that I would  accept the crumbs of an affair. Clearly, I was broken and did not know the truth. He is true when he says when the spirit of truth comes, it will teach you what you need to know and that truth will set you free. 

One night in my sleep while dreaming, I was told to read Psalms 51. My God was he speaking loud and clear! Read it when you have a moment. It will make things clear. I had read many Psalms in my life, but never saw that one; neither had I ever received a clearer instruction.  It was clear what he was asking me to do. Repent - change your mind about your sin. See it as I see it. He hates sin. I hate my sin. Did I say hate? I am repulsed by the fact that darkness was in me, although I thought I was a “good person.” But he says if you come to me he is faithful to cleanse us of unrighteousness and set us on a firm foundation. He has been doing that and it has culminated in the last instruction he is requiring of me before I can close the door to the ways in which an adversarial spirit would attempt to use against me to put me in a dark, shameful, condemned regretful place. These are the emotions that provide a doorway for the enemy to temp us. He showed me no one is exempt from temptation; even the so called “good people.”

Please forgive me for my ignorance. Please forgive me for my lack of love. Please forgive me for hurting you. Please forgive me for stealing. Please forgive me for participating in a process an adversarial spirit uses to steal trust in relationships. We are all connected. What one person does, does in fact affect other people even if the world says it doesn’t matter. It does matter. If we want to live in peace with ourselves, our spouses, our families and God we must draw close to him to search, know and experience real intimacy with God. Intimacy with God draws you to him and not the arms of another person who is not your spouse. These were his instructions to me. My marriage did not end because of this affair.  The affair was a conduit, and your spouse was as a messenger; an angel. An angel is a messenger; be it good or bad. It is my hope your marriage is in a good place, healed or in the process of healing. I hope this message strengthens you. I don’t know if you should share my contact with you through this message with your spouse. I defer to the spirit of God to help you navigate that terrain. It is my hope peace and love will  prevail and will endure. It is my prayer your heart can receive my apology. If not, I understand. Forgiveness is a process. God says he is faithful to forgive us of all of our sins. However, he wants us to know the healing process is delayed or held up the longer we take. I know this from first hand experience. I’ve had to do a lot of forgiving of my parents, family members, and myself. This is where it has most difficult because I never thought I was capable of falling so low or failing so miserably. I am, and I did. So, I send this message to you in humble sincerity and thankfulness that The Most High God loved me enough to rescue me from ignorance so that I might share this with you. It’s been painful. But I’m thankful that God can restore truth to lives. He can rebuild broken and cracked foundations. I held in my heart maybe one day my husband would soften his heart toward God as well and repair what was broken from the beginning that led us to the dark place. I don’t know. But I see all of us through a different lens. God is extremely patient with us and wants all of us to come into the knowledge of who He truly is. It’s a process. I pray I have reached out to you at a time in your life and in the part of your life process that can receive these words with the spirit of me and God’s intent - love. 

And so it shall be. 


“Be careful to obey all the commands I am giving you today. Then you will live and multiply, and you will enter and occupy the land the Lord swore to give your ancestors. Remember how the Lord your God led you through the wilderness for these forty years, humbling you and testing you to prove your character, and to find out whether or not you would obey his commands. Yes, he humbled you by letting you go hungry and then feeding you with manna, a food previously unknown to you and your ancestors. He did it to teach you that people do not live by bread alone; rather, we live by every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord.”

Deuteronomy 8:1-3 New Living Translation


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